by Ann Evanston | Jan 7, 2018 | Intimacy, Relationship
Too often we can associate intimacy with sex. Not that sex can’t be wildly intimate, but there are other ways to achieve intimacy with your lover. And often the non-sexual ways create the deepest spiritual connection.
For example, this Christmas my husband and I chose to have a home spa day. The goal was simply to nurture each other, and our bodies. We chilled bottle of champagne, and I pulled out every lotion, and scrubber and facial I could find. We made sugar scrubs for each other as well, choosing an essential oil to scent them.
Wearing our robes, with a glass of bubbles, we went through a spa experience together. Deep conditioning our hair, polishing our faces, dealing with those feet! And lastly a full body sugar scrub and shower together.
No sex.
No, that wasn’t the rule! It’s just what naturally happened. Sharing together, talking, laughing, touching each other‘s bodies…scrubbing and cleaning each other. Those things created intimacy. A beautifully deep, soul felt connection.
Intimacy this more often about nurturing the other then it is taken care of your own needs. It’s about the ability to listen, see, touch, and feel. It’s about allowing yourself to be imperfect and complete at the same time.
by Ann Evanston | Nov 26, 2017 | Intimacy, Relationship
Receiving unconditional love is a rare and precious thing. The realization of having it in my life has been so gratifying.
My husband loves me no matter what. He is my number one fan, and biggest champion. He believes I can do anything, and supports the things that I want to do 100%. His love goes deeper than that though.
He loves me when I’m dressed up and looking fabulous.
He loves me when I haven’t showered for three days!
He loves me whether I’m 150 pounds, 120 pounds.
He loves me with make up on, he loves me with make up off and he thinks I’m beautiful either way.
He’s loves me when I cook dinner, and he loves me when I say I’m not in the mood for cooking.
The love is unconditional.
Having unconditional love from someone else requires that your first unconditionally love yourself. I even went through this with my husband; he couldn’t love me that deeply when I was blocking it with my own self hate.
Where do you need to love yourself more so that you can receive the love you want?
by Ann Evanston | Oct 29, 2017 | Intimacy, Relationship
My husband and I have a relationship that many admire. To see us, you know we are deeply, and intimately in love. You know I am “Bonnie” to his “Clyde.” We are often told by people who see many couples that we are they one they appreciate the most. Simply because of how we treat each other. (Yes, sad to hear stories of lack of love and respect in public!)
We aren’t perfect! That’s not real. We fight. Like ugly when it happens. And in 20 years we have had low, low times of hurt.
We believe in commitment and working through everything. And we know one thing to be true to have an intimate, deep, loving relationship.
You must be vulnerable and express emotion to truly find love. You must express it ALL. You must also allow your partner the same. We truly learned how to do this at a low, low point. We had to find a safe space to ask and answer honestly. A place where we wouldn’t start fighting!
If you don’t have intimate love yet, you still have to be vulnerable enough to express love. To be love. That’s how you receive love. That’s how intimate love happens.
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