Have you ever been abused? Taking advantage of? Stolen from? Bullied?
Maybe as I ask you those questions you are flashing back to childhood. How many of you, though, have experienced these kind of things as an adult?
I have for sure. And it’s interesting being an entrepreneur and experiencing those kinds of things in your adult business life. I honestly had never imagined being hurt like that as a business person. Ever.
I never expected to feel lied to, abused, bullied and betrayed. Maybe I thought there was some emotional distance in my work.
Boy was I wrong.
See, I had an amazing relationship with an organization. We dated well! Both of us seemingly knew our roles and loved and respected that partnership. It was great until I decided to leave. With full grace and integrity I gave plenty of notice and opportunity to train my replacement. Then the nightmare began.
I had led so many women to love this organization I didn’t know what to do. And I didn’t know how to deal, so my warrior retreated to her safe place.
Some people close enough to me came and learned and understood. The majority of women had no idea why I just disappeared. I hurt them unknowingly because I was hurt.
In this fragile space I actually had a client, who got tremendous results working with me, ask to teach my work. About a month later she stole it all and made it her own business. That placed me in full victim mode.
I retreated even deeper because I had to learn how to be vulnerable and open again and not be worried about being taken advantage of. It meant that I left people in my network hanging. And I deeply apologize for that.
Now I have come out the other side: a better woman, and surer of how to deal in the future with the crazy things that can knock you upside your head and business. I’ve come out unafraid to share my story. I’ve come out unafraid of the bullies and bad-mouths.
They can’t hurt me anymore. I’m excited to re-emerge. Excited to be more vulnerable. More successful. More ready.
All I hope is that, if you are one of those people left disappointed in me, and you’re reading this, you will forgive me and get to know the new Ann. I look forward to getting to know you once again. And if you did not know the old Ann. I think you will really appreciate the new one!
Overcoming Being Scared , element 2 in my book “The Influence Factor” is probably one of the most important and powerful things we can do to be successful in our businesses. What I find as I listen to my
clients more and more, it isn’t fear of failure it’s fear of success that paralyzes them and keeps them from truly stepping in to their greatness.
Hell, most of us have failed 1 million times and we still get up and keep going! What is it then about success that can move us into that phase of truly being scared, like I talk about in my first book The Influence Factor?
Why is it that every limiting belief we can possibly have comes up when we are stepping into that next phase of greatness?
For example I recently relaunched my own stage!
BOOM! Totally excited to step into greatness and be visible again!
That the wasn’t scary for me. I’m ready, made the commitment, visualizing what I want in the room, all of the goodness that goes into making that happen. Then I got the marketing done as my “90 Day Market your Event Plan” tells all of my clients to do. I put the event online and got ready to email everybody to get them to sign up. My visualization is to have 100 people in the room. I am ready!!
As soon as I sent that email fear overcame me.
That moment of “what if I only get 10 people? What if nobody signs up?” All of those limiting beliefs are only stopping me from keeping on the goal of greatness that I desire. The success I desire. Those fears paralyze success.
You must wipe them from your mind and stick to the success you want. You must realize that unconditional self-love is required to have the success you desire. You must realize that no matter how many people sign up you will give a wildly successful event.
And honestly if only 10 sign-up will I still sell a large portion of the room and have a fabulous day? Absolutely!
So why do you allow your limiting beliefs to become the hamper that stops you from success?
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I run a monthly mastermind called Women Wine and Wisdom. It is been powerful on both personal and professional life levels, if I do say so myself! I asked: “What do you know you need to start to step into your greatness and why aren’t you starting? What are you afraid of?”
The women who show up and share real and raw, are amazing at this event! We all grow through the sharing, without a doubt. A common theme I’ve heard over and over again is around visibility, as well as fear. The conversation went deeper into it’s really fear of success not fear of failure. And these women dug deeper and started to share with tear filled eyes how much they fear success and what comes along with it.
I realized that my work has always been based on developing self-worth. It goes back to my first job out of college counseling abused and neglected teenage girls. I’ve realized that that work is really what is required to transcend to the place that you dream of being. Interestingly I recently shared with my COMPEL SPEAK SELL MasterMind clients five fundamental areas that I think they need to work on in ordered have a wildly successful business.
One of those five areas is their Vision of Self. See, all the technology, the systems, and the “how to’s” are hard to do at a level of greatness when you have not gotten to a place of unconditional self-worth.
And many people, go through life thinking they have it, but they don’t. And it’s getting in the way.
When you have unconditional self-worth you understand that anything “external” will not add to or diminish it. These are things like money, running a business, achieving certain things. Those are about market or social worth. Your self-worth has to be seen or felt as infinite and unchanging in order to truly get to a place where the “external’s” can happen, and flourish in your life.
I know in my heart that teaching more of this, in combination with the other business related items I teach, will change these women, and my clients’ lives. Man do I love what I do!
Are you ready to take on the journey of truly transcending…never failing into failure again? Email me.
You should dream. You should dream really, really big. And then you should
work really hard and do everything in your power to make those dreams
happen.
See, action turns dreaming into living your dreams. Action is what makes
your dreams your life not just something out there that you hope for.
I believe there is something between having the dream and putting in the
work to make the dream your life. I believe that is a simple mindset that
highly successful people have that differentiates them from others.
I believe that the people who make their big dreams their life also believe
with every fiber of their being, “it is possible.”
I believe the people who live their biggest dreams also know that “feeling”
cannot get in the way. Feelings like “I’m tired” and “I don’t feel like it
right now” are not allowed to stand in the way of taking action.
You should dream big and then take action and make it happen.
What I find is that many entrepreneurs struggle with playing their own game.
They see other entrepreneurs doing things a certain way, and want to be like
them. They observe what they think is highly professional, or engaging, or
even something that might be selling really well and they copy it. Suddenly,
they are playing someone else’s game. And in order to really win, you have
to play your game.
When I was a child, I remember my father teaching me to play chess. When
he’d beat me he’d often say “You were playing my game. In order to be a
winner you need to play your game.” What’s funny is over the years I have
said the same thing to my nephews when playing very simple games.
Too often I watch coaches and leaders of industries teach people how to be
like them. Then they wonder why they struggle and fail in the long run.
Systems and processes are important, yet you still need to be you while you
run those systems and processes.
I get it. Imitation is the highest form of flattery. Initially, and while
you’re still discovering the best of who you are, you may imitate someone
else. In the long run though, you have to discover who you truly are. That
is how, as an entrepreneur, you play your game and succeed.
You transcend when you make changes that don’t go back!
If you enjoyed this video blog, can you do me a HUGE favor? Will you please share it on Facebook or twitter? That is how we spread the entrepreneur love! Thank you!
Have you ever been abused? Taking advantage of? Stolen from? Bullied?
